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Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Self Discipline Problem

Anyone else ever have something they commit to doing, but find out they are slacking on it or aren't doing it period?  I have something like this happening to me right now.  Our house church decided we were going to read the Bible in a year together.  I am super excited about this!  We have a chronological list with 6 readings in a week.  So, we should be reading the Bible daily minus one day of the week (unless we choose to read something else that day).  Honestly, it is only a couple of chapters per day...this should NOT be a problem for me.  But alas, it is.  I find that my self discipline is lacking, and I am not reading on a daily basis.  This is soooo frustrating.

I feel like I should be able to read every day with no issues.  I do have a desire to read every day, but that doesn't mean I always remember.  Especially during this pregnancy (it seems like I am forgetting everything right now).  Then, when I come to the realization that I have forgotten I feel even worse.  I can't believe that I actually forget to do something that is so important to me.  GRRR!!

I just want to get to a point where I have disciplined myself.  I don't want this to become a "habit."  Unless there is such a thing as a good habit that you are being intentional about...is there?  I guess I have always viewed habits as negative or unintentional actions.  Hmm...can they be intentional?  I guess I don't really know the answer to that.  I mean, maybe you can be intentional about making something a habit, but after it is a habit, is it something that you just do without appreciating?  Ha, I am way out of my league here.

I will continue to pray that the Spirit convicts me to read each day.  I hope that I can grow spiritually through this and do it with joy.



2 comments:

Allison Leese said...

I read the whole bible. I think it was in 7th grade. I would read every night before bed. That was the best time for me to relax and really concentrate on what I was reading.

Tab said...

I kind of wish I had a set time during the day where I knew I would focus. I have tried that before, and it never seems to hold. I always find that I am thinking more about sleeping (especially now) than what I am reading. :(

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